ugh, what am I to do? i don't want to kill my self out of irresponsibility and laziness but life got so boring that everything is so monotonous: everyday seems to be a repitition of yesterday, everybody seems to be doing the whole thing again and again, and everywhere seems to be having the whole pattern of activities from time to time! things got so boring( perhaps i'm not the only one feeling the deal!) why am i feeling this kind of emptiness? i have great friends, i know! i have great family, and i'm thankful! i have great experiences, I guess?!
a feeling of needing someone greater envelops me, squeezing me tighter and tighter, crushing my nerves into numbness. a need for someone more vibrant, a need for somebony who possesses more will power, someone who has wealthier experiences. Eureka! that is it! i'm needing someone whom i can recognize as a saviour and as a hero! i know and i acknowledge the presence of God but i am in great sublimation to find a human a, a person and a being whom i can trust, value and look upon into!
i don't ,know if this is an after effect of numerous frustrations in life but i really got bothered by the prevalent situation i am into! a gest for some, maybe! but it is really the hard truth that i am in deep sorrow and agony upon finding this person! a real quest for a once in a lifetime experience!
i may offend and perhaps hurt some by these staetments but i don't knoe why life got kind'a went like this!
i don't have any of those problems tantamount to buildings and skyscrapers but to me it seems that this is a real big one! oh i have another problem which really s not a big one. i'm torn between the decision of choosing my happiness and success!!! i'm quite bothered by this but i am certain that time would help a lot!
8 comments:
Hey shoga jira,
we share the same situation at this moment..I am also very bored, i've got nothing to do..Im always facing the screen of my laptop!
do you really need a hero? or maybe the saviour is you yourself!
get out there, and sniff some fresh air...
and regarding that problem of yours, I say success and happiness goes together...success is a result of happiness...and to be happy means success in your endeavors..if you refer success to material prosperity or high status in life, well' that is not..it's what you call "gain" on that certain aspect..aim to be happy and succesful,do the right thing and always feel good about your self and what you have around you!
your worthy of your happiness and success, they're your companions, they will never leave you..believe me..
oh come on miss kiyuki i think this happiness of mine will hinder my future success! it has something to do with this darn guys! i don't know why should girls have only two options 1 is to like guys and the other is to like somebody from the race of Eve! sorry, i guess i went wrong, we have 3 options my friend. the 3rd is to like somebody whether he... she is from the same sex or not! in short SILAhis!!!! whaaaah. what i'm trying to say is that why can't we(girls) just not like somebody and not feel happy about it? why is there this felt need, this innate need to look for somebody that you can share your dreams and fantasies in all aspects of life; be it sexual, physical, mental, spiritual etc., and feel complete. i know there are bachelors who just died without having that s@% thing but there must be certain great frustrations that made their life miserable even just for once! and you know wha?i don't want to have the same lines in my palms like theirs,i don't want to feel frustrations just because of failure to have somebody to love and somebody to love me!!!no not ever! that is what this problem all about! its not just between choosing future success and future happiness but it also has something to do with the realities and compulsories of life!!!
eiow jira...
my nose is/are bleeding because of your post.. and so with the comments.. uhm... that emptiness you feel and the longing to have someone to look up to, and finding the right choice are just but evidences of our existence... what i mean is ... our proof that we are human and we are living in the world carrying in our pockets the mission we need to accomplish. I guess you are heading to something very important and that is Finding yourself...=]
yeah! same here friend. i'm feeling the same as you do. it's very tiring to tell you honestly. then again, there's a lot more of that than just feeling weird and suicidal. just enjoy every bit of happiness that you have and don't pretend even for a second.
I agree with Kirasue and carl Uno..Its just a proof that we are human...and yes, enjoy every minute of your happiness...
in later life you will finally realize that your ultimate happiness lies somewhere you would not expect...yes, there are those who are fated not to prosper in their lovelife, some with their carrer, others with family and friends...our happiness is not the same with each and everyone..find within you what truly makes you happy, and don't expect that every every aspect of your life will be like heaven on earth...it's just a matter of acceptance of the situation but then, strive for it..
maybe just like you, I am unfortunate with love, but I would try to strive more to gain even just slight of it..
it seems that i am ever left behind with whats happenin' . . hehe
well, it shocked me a lot when I hapen to open your blog!
femz, perhaps thats part of your growth. . That only manifests that you are indeed 18..hehe, just be sure of that pitter-patter of your feelings, it might only be an infatuation. . just like a baby tooth that would soon fall out and will be changed be a permament one( your true love)
Missin' u already . . .
happy New year . .
bOgs!!! hehehe...send me an email at arenaskinjie@gmail.com so I may know your google email address...Then I can invite you to join our Google group..hehe...so even if we'll, sooner or later, be so far away from each other, we can still communicate through it...We, The Indestructible batch of NDMU BSEd English!!! Hurrah!! Hurrah!! hehehehehe..........
Post a Comment