Merry Christmas and I hope it's a Happy New Year!

December 20, 2009
10:30 in the evening!
Merry Christmas!
Merry Christmas!
Merry Christmas and I hope it's a happy New Year.
It's an unbearable night.
He smiled at me and I smiled back at him
He danced with me likeI dance with strangers in the dancefloor
He sat beside me and I told him to draw his chair closer to me
He whispered my ear and I chatted back to his ear
He caressed by back and i let his hands stay there.
He kissed me and I just let him kiss me.
I never can disagree
it feel poisoned, sick and intoxicated.
I feel slumber, vulnerable and fragile!
I knew him as my best girfriend's ultimate crush.
that's all that ties my acquaintance with him.
I never desired to be with him.
"Merry Christmas" we started the night's affair by giving each other this heart-felt greeting.
HE SMILED AT ME AND WE SHOOK HANDS.
after eating, we opened the gifts we receive from evrybody around.
we drink a lot and submitted ourselves to merriment!
there it happened!
It's an unbearable night.
He smiled at me and I smiled back at him
He danced with me likeI dance with strangers in the dancefloor
He sat beside me and I told him to draw his chair closer to me
He whispered my ear and I chatted back to his ear
He caressed by back and i let his hands stay there.
He kissed me and I just let him kiss me.
I never can disagree
it feel poisoned, sick and intoxicated.
I feel slumber, vulnerable and fragile!
I knew him as my best girfriend's ultimate crush.
that's all that ties my acquaintance with him.
I don't know how to tell this to my friend but I kissed his boy and I liked it!!!
ugh. it's not a very lovely thing to remember but i feel very guilty because of that!
For now, I want to say sorry for what I have done. I love you but, merry Christmas and I hope it's a happy new year.

I thought YOU starts with WHY and ends with YOU...

Literally YOU starts with Y and ends with U, on the other side, there is a fact that if we would spell these letters, they would mean differently!
I really thought that my existence was for him! the answer to my never-ending WHY's. I always say to myself that it is YOU who answers every WHY of my thought, words and actions!
I just thought so because you were nice and emphatic! I really don't know! maybe you hurt me much when you made me think that i was not in a way or the other connected to your problems and that means i'm not one way or the other connected to your life!
there is no possible way to getting back into the past of fantasy. where lies and liars abound-this does not mean an escape from the adversities and cruel world but an attempt to leave behind people who should not be involved with the journey of my life! the things that can be faced with straight shoulders and straightforward vision is the reality of the Present!
Damn! T'was a hard bitter way clearing things OUT! it's the biggest of all the mistakes i've done so far in the half of my whole life!
T'was a hard bitter way out but I say it's ultimately effective! how could i just afforded myself to fooled around for such a long time! I pity myself, though I shoul not, Nevertheless, I pity that liar more! I admit that I'm also a liar! I was, I'm still and will always be a liar in no matter circumstance lie is needed for somebody's good or somebody's disgrace according to my subjective analysis! I grant punishment to those who've done wrong to me! I declare war against their substance as well as their souls! Unforgivig as I may appear but there is a big possibility that if i don't break things up with them or with him I will be the one to turn up broken at the end of the day!
Stupid me! Foolish them! He deceived me with such a facade of genuine friendship but it's a one-sided perception! I've poured thousand of tears over him! got to my feet and had to pull myself back again for a countless of times whenever troubles come before or after him! I may sound so selfish but I think if I would not be selfish I would totally be shattered into tiny pieces and who migth know? I'll never be able to regain nor vindicate myself!!!
Somebody might understand, mostly would not! this post is written for self expression and not derrogate anybody's personality! after all it's an intellectual property! I own this feeling and i have the right to express it!!!
the next time you fall for someone close to you, watch out! you may be deceived with an angelic smile behind that pretentious mask!!!beacuse there is no possible way to getting back into the past of fantasy. where lies and liars abound-this does not mean an escape from the adversities and cruel world but an attempt to leave behind people who should not be involved with the journey of my life! the things that can be faced with straight shoulders and straightforward vision is the reality of the Present!

STD victims shout:

English people in times of STD!!!(stress, trouble and despair)
their agonies reflected in song lyrics:
I feel adrenalin rushing through my head!!!:_i DUNNO_
said shishini! a.k.a. akire
the old me is dead and gone!:_Justin Timberlake_
said masha!
Que sera sera!!!:_cant remember_
said mapagpumiglas! a.k.a. BIDAMAN
Inubos kong lahat panahon ko sa 'yo!, kulang na kulang ba? hindi pa ba sapat?:_MYMP_
said Nyl Anneish! a.k.a HART JR.
you are my destiny, jai ho!_pussycat dolls featuring nicole_
said raijho a.k.a. moji
I believe I believe!!!: _Il Divo_
said Mr. University 2008 a.k.a shoga ( adapted from mapagpumiglas)
I gave my best but i guess my best wasn't good enough!:_cant Remember_
said Iwa a.k.a. Rocky
tonight will be the night that i will fall for you over again don't make me change my mind!!!
said jira a.k.a rai
oops i did it again!!!_BRITNEY(nice song but i prefer if you seek amy better nyahahaahah)
said sisterhood a.k.a. teddy
you left me all alone, go on do what you want!!!
said the supahmodel a.k.a ALPHY
it's the climb!!!
said GGOOODDESSS
i apologize for th incomplete entries: i did not have enough time to research for other English peole's voices because of proximity.


i am happy that almost all of the things are accomplished, though some are late some are incomplete. life is a dominant process-based assessment. things we have made do not WARRANT the label for a successful person. it is on the process, how we put meaning to those experiences that we encouter and how we responded to them.
God will always be there but be sure to give you surrender to him eve you littlest doubt.

no

matter

what

i'm

always

here

on

the other

side